Starting Kindergarten Right |
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[Guest Editorial published 8/7/08]
Kindergarten is a whole new world from when we were children. Standards have gotten higher each year, expectations greater and responsibilities larger for parents in sending their children off to school. Is my child ready? How will they measure up to other students their age? How will the teacher give my child the individual attention they require to meet their needs? How can I have the best relationship with my child’s teacher? All of these questions are on the minds of parents in these weeks preceding the start of the new school year. The answers vary in response to each individual teacher, parent and child. But starting off the school year right is the best way to ensure success for your child, and peace of mind for families and their teacher. As a teacher of young children for over 15 years, and a mother of two young boys, here are some insights I have gained from both perspectives.
1. Your Child Knows and Feels Your Anxieties
This can be said of the first day and all the year through. Whether it is your demeanor, words and actions as you are saying goodbye (or trying for the third time while crying at the classroom door) or later in the year at conference time, your child will be tuned into your feelings. It is a known fact that there will be more crying parents than students on the first day. I myself was one of them, but had the beauty of the teacher’s restroom to bawl in as my son went to the classroom next door. Yes- next door. The first day is the first of many milestones they will reach this year. Share in their excitement, recognize their achievements and do your best to keep feelings of anxiety in check. Say goodbye, give a big smile then hug and walk away. Your child will feel more secure and your teacher will appreciate that opportunity to gain your child’s trust.
2. Kindergarten is not Preschool
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Not all children attend Preschool before Kindergarten, but a large majority does. This prior experience certainly can have a direct influence on the start of the new school year. But again, this depends upon the individual school and child. [Continue here from the newsletter's "READ MORE" break.] Some programs can be very routine and structured, where others are more for social development and play. Understand that the Kindergarten year, just as First, Second and any grade level- is a new year and a new start. “Johnny never did that in Preschool!” could be a positive or negative statement depending on the circumstances. A new year means a new peer group, new environment and new behaviors. Be open and supportive to your child’s teacher and realize the expectations and standards for Kindergarten are much different from Preschool. And in most instances- you are not paying for your child to attend. Preschools are less likely to address challenging behaviors in fear you will take your business elsewhere.
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3. Too Much Information!
The "intake" papers given to families are sometimes the first written information a teacher receives about their new student. This is an opportunity for you, as a parent or guardian, to share insights about your child. Who knows the child best but you? How much is too much information? Every parent believes their child is the most brilliant, kindest and creative of all the new Kindergarteners. Right? Brings a smile to my face thinking of adjectives parents have chosen to describe them. Again, realize the child you know, love and have at home can be a very different child in school. You’ve heard the old saying "a child always listens better to their teacher?" there is evidence of that and the inverse as well.
Sending your child to school with volumes of information on them is unnecessary. Pre-labelling and making statements such as "My child acts like they have ADHD. They just can’t sit still", could be better presented as "Billy struggles with sitting for long periods of time." "Annie reads at a first grade level" is better stated as "Annie is a confident reader."
Teachers, especially at Kindergarten level, want to know a child’s interests, strengths and struggles. Does your child enjoy more arts and crafts or hands-on activities? Do they have a love of bugs, fairy tales or Scooby-Doo? What makes your child anxious and what are they afraid of? Giving some introductory information can help teachers in a child’s transition the first weeks of school. But have confidence in the fact that your teacher will get to know your child in their own special way. Please note: families that have experienced notable changes or challenges should share these with their child’s teacher. Divorce, life-changing events and significant trauma can be shared discretely and concisely at this time. Less is more oftentimes in terms of information you present about your child at the start of school.
4. Good Communication
Teachers use weekly or monthly newsletters, email and phone to communicate important classroom and personal student information to parents. Be sure you are aware of the best way to send and receive communications to your child’s teacher at the start of school. Check backpacks and folders daily! It is the BEST way to support your child’s learning and their teacher. It can be traumatic for your child if somehow they are one of the only ones who did not get their permission slip signed, or their great work from that day is now ripped and crumpled from being in the bottom of their bag for a week.
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The realistic expectation is not to receive a DAILY report from your teacher. More and more do I receive emails such as “How was Mary’s day today?” And though I would love to share with each family everyday my observations and insights I couldn't possibly! Teachers often spend lunch and planning times communicating with families which is truly a labor of love!
Having a routine with your child of helping them pack and unpack their own bags can assist in your notes reaching the teacher and the teacher’s communication reaching you! It also helps children gain responsibility and ownership of such important things as permission slips, lunch money, behavior notes (both bad and GOOD) and their schoolwork. (Which in years to come becomes their homework!)
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Older siblings can be helpful in exchanges of communication as well, especially in terms of last-minute changes and messages. (Child will be picked up instead of taking the bus for instance.) When in doubt of any changes in routine and schedule, calling the front office in addition to sending a written note, email or phone message is good practice. Finally, most teachers give the "Open-door policy". Understand we always want parents to feel welcome but unexpected visits can oftentimes be disruptive to the class and especially to your child. Before and after school conversations with teachers are often an opportunity to connect personally with your child’s teacher, but remember to respect their boundaries and remember we have families too!
5. ENJOY THE MAGIC!!!
Kindergarten is truly a magical journey. So much growth occurs during this year- I feel more than any other! When those essential building blocks of letters and numbers fall into place the world opens up to our children! The excitement to learn so many things beyond the three R’s-reading writing and arithmetic is alive and celebrated each and every day of this first school year. Losing a tooth and tying a shoe is as big an accomplishment as learning to add. Let the year be filled with joyful moments to remember forever.
Even if you cannot participate as a parent volunteer, attend a field trip or special event during the school day, there are many ways to celebrate Kindergarten with your child. Notes in a lunchbox, a special breakfast on the first day (chocolate chip and mini marshmallow pancakes are our tradition) and taking the time for your child to show and share their work with you are all simple ways to share in the magic. Don’t be afraid to think and act like a kid every once in while. Use silly voices when you read together, let leprechauns play tricks in your home, jump on a sled and race your child downhill- embrace this special time together.
We all grow up too fast and Kindergarten is the perfect time to hold onto the magic for a little while longer. Teachers choose to teach this age because we LOVE it! I know I learn as much about the world around us from these beautiful children each year as they do! Life should be a journey, and not a race. Walk with your child and teacher together with joy in your heart and smiles on your faces through this part of it and start the year right! It is a partnership and one shared affectionately.
An apple on the first day of school given from your child to their teacher still goes a long way!!
Alison Adams
GreatIdeasForKids.com Featured Expert on Early-childhood Education
Alison Adams has taught numerous years in Preschool, Pre-Kindergarten and currently both Kindergarten and Kindergarten Enrichment at Monarch K-8 (Louisville, CO) where she has been for the last 8 years. She has received recognition for Teacher Excellence including nominations to the Amgen Award for Teacher Excellence, The Jared Polis Foundation, Starbuck’s Top Teacher Award and the CAEYC Annual Teacher Excellence Awards. Alison proudly serves on the Advisory Board of The Dakota Center (Longmont, CO) for social and relationship development in children. She has formerly served as the President and Vice President of the PTA at Monarch. Alison graduated from Keene State College with a Bachelor of Science Degree in Elementary Education and Early Childhood Development. She is the proud mother of two boys.
Alison has written and recorded a collection of original music for use in both classrooms and at home, with companion books for teaching all areas of early childhood development and primary elementary curriculum. She has conducted numerous workshops for teachers and parents to share the benefits of using music to teach! Alison's music and books will soon be available to the public through Gabriel Stewart Productions.
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Last Updated ( Wednesday, 29 October 2008 )
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